The Things No One Will Tell You: The Second Trimester

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If you haven’t read the first trimester and would like to please click here. Otherwise, please continue what you were doing.

For those who are unsuspecting mothers-to-be, or fathers, I am here to help you know what to expect. Most pregnant women go about their pregnancy in complete bliss. These are LIES! This is the front they have learned to put on for everyone around them who are not pregnant. (Those of you who have a buddy that is pregnant with you to suffer with, I totally envy you.) People are incredibly judgmental and jealous of pregnant women that if we display anything aside from utter joy and excitement, we are automatically dubbed “unfit” for parenting. Luckily, approaching the second trimester, the front begins to fade slightly and we begin to genuinely feel excited. There really is something in there; pouring out all my beer wasn’t a total waste.

The upsides to being pregnant during the second trimester:
-The hormones calm down severely. You can actually manage a day without crying, hell, maybe even a week. And you can go back to that grocery store and apologise to that cashier for yelling at her, or was that just me?
-Those flutters you feel in your belly isn’t nausea anymore, that’s your little jellybean floating around….or just gas.
-Your little, itty-bitty is starting to take form. If you are just now getting your first sonogram then this will definitely make it a reality for you. Also you’ll get to find out the sex of your baby soon!
-There are many other things to look forward to but I’m sure the baby books cover all that. After all, those were written to make you feel better. However, I am here to wake you up and bring you back to reality.

The not so uplifting parts:
-Enjoy the sleep you get in this trimester, this will be the last time you ever sleep again! And the best sleep. Except……
-Be prepared for waking up anywhere from 1 to 25,362 times a night for any number of reasons. Potty breaks, re-hydration (because your jellybean loves stealing EVERYTHING.), or to satisfy cravings (because again, the thief.)
-If you’ve been waiting your whole life to get those DD-cups, think again! Your under wire of your bras are now trying to slice you in half like a bad magic trick. Not to mention the pain in your back you will never stop feeling again. Wear nursing bras and sports bras only when you reach the point where you can not go without a bra at all.
-This one, I won’t be going into much detail, simply because it’s gross but I will give you a heads up. Two words: vaginal discharge. Wear panty liners!
-Some may experience extreme body changes. I don’t know, specifically, of many however I do know of one, in particular, from personal experience. Carpal tunnel, completely brought on by the pregnancy and made worse from everyday activities and pregnancy swelling. Oh and tennis elbow; not sure if that is the technical term but that’s what my doctor called it so I’m going with it.
-Clothes will start to steadily shrink, begin buying larger clothes NOW. Later will be too late and make sure the clothes fit you loose at first. You will continue to grow and the last thing you’ll want to do is go out and be on your swollen feet in shoes that hardly fit.
-The best type of shoes: none. But if you must then flip flops and slip-on’s have been most beneficial to me.
-And if at all possible (although at this point it’ll be too late) DO NOT get pregnant at any point during or right before the summer. You will spend the remainder of your pregnancy constantly over heated on the edge of a heat stroke.

Happy pregnancy.

Next, on Motherhood with No Floaties, symptoms of the third trimester, learn as I go.

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